Reset Osmostat and The Envy of the Clinic

 That time I was in the hospital, the time after my first chemo, the time I refer to as "That Time I Was So Sick", 2 out of the 9 diagnoses I had, were Hyponatremia and S.I.A.D.S. 

Hyponatremia is the medical word meaning that I had an electrolyte disturbance which made my blood sodium level too low. Normal blood sodium level is between 135 and 145 mEg/L. Mine was down to 115. That is very bad (and dangerous). It caused me to have severe headaches and confusion. If sodium goes low enough it can cause permanent brain damage, coma, and even death. If mine had dropped any lower, I was going to be taken to ICU.

Dr. V called in a Nephrologist (Kidney Doctor) who diagnosed and treated me for S.I.A.D.S. which is Syndrome of Inappropriate Antiduretic Hormone. I don't understand it, despite doctors explaining it and also reading about it. What I know is it makes the body fluids too dilute, thus making the sodium too low.

These conditions were caused by both my Lymphoma and the chemo they used to treat it.

After I finished chemo and all my blood levels were slowly coming back up to the normal range, my sodium stubbornly remained at 128. Because I was asymptomatic, Dr. V didn't think there was any clinical significance to it. But because my husband had seen how gravely ill I had been from low sodium, he remained concerned. So, Dr. V referred us back to the kidney doctor who treated me in the hospital.

Kidney Doc want me to do a 24-hour urine test. I was given an orange jug and a "urine hat" in a red biohazard bag. I was told to pee into the hat, which conveniently had a spout, and pour it into the jug, which was to be stored in the refrigerator, for 24 hours.

After I started the test, I quickly realized I was going to pee more than that jug would hold. I called the clinic and asked if I could use a jar for the excess--I was thinking about one of my canning jars. The nurse said yes, "as long as its clean".  Really. Did she think I was going to finish the jar of peanut butter and start peeing into it without washing it? As it turned out, I used a clean plastic milk jug.

The next day, when I delivered my 2 jugs of pee to the clinic, I thought I would be able to drop it off and go. But no, I had to have a seat in the waiting room, with my 2 jugs of pee proudly displayed. About 15 minutes later, I was called to the back and still lugging my 2 jugs of pee, which are quite heavy by the way, seated in the lab to have blood drawn.

There was already another woman there having blood drawn, but her nurse was not having any luck. I commented about my jugs of pee and the woman exclaimed, "2 jugs! I only had about this much", indicating a couple of inches with her fingers.

My nurse got into one of my big fat juicy veins right away and the blood flowed. Both the patient in the next chair and her nurse looked longingly at my body fluids--my 2 jugs of pee and my easily collected 2 vials of blood. As I walked away, the nurse was still gouging around in the poor lady's arm, trying to get into a vein.

When I returned to Kidney Doc, he laughed at the amount I peed--5 liters. All the testing they did came back normal. He said I no longer have S.I.A.D.S. and that my kidneys work just fine. He said I have Reset Osmostat. Which basically means my new sodium level is 128 and that is now normal for me.

I told him about my experience in the lab and he said, "I bet you were the envy of the clinic". 

 

 

Pictures at this post are compliments of Google Images

 

Staying Positive

I believe a positive attitude helps health. I believe that people who can remain hopeful, determined, and positive have better outcomes when faced with illness. I believe optimism heals. I believe that God wants us to feel happy and confident.

I know that maintaining a positive attitude can be hard work and almost impossible to maintain when faced with major losses. . .of loved ones, relationships, security, health, serenity. There have been many times when I have felt hopeless and scared and sad and mad and worried and in pain and weak and sick with fever.

As I have journeyed through Lymphoma, I have had to search my soul and I have often had to reach very deep within to find something to be thankful for. Other times, my blessings are abundant, obvious, and easily felt.

To help myself stay encouraged while facing a life-threatening illness and coping with side-effects of toxic treatments, I have tried to keep my words and language positive.

It is very popular to use such language as battle with cancer, cancer warrior, the beast, the nasty beast, war against cancer, victim of cancer, monster, struggle, hate, cancer sucks, fight. 

I don't use any of those words. They are all negative; some are violent.  I don't use hateful words in any other aspect of my life and I believe in peace.  In fact, I'm glad my cancer has its own name, Lymphoma, so I don't even have to use the word cancer if I don't want to. I call it my Lymphoma Journey. I will not hate my Lymphoma as it has become part of me and I will not hate myself.

I try not to fear my Lymphoma. If it takes my life then that will be the way I go.

The Beginning

Last August 10th, several family members got together for a few days visit to our twin grandsons. We all stayed in the same hotel and we all left sick with upper respiratory symptoms. We didn't speak of it at the time but we all thought there was something funky about the ventilation in the rooms. 

Monday, my husband and I woke with scratchy throats. Tuesday, I developed a scorching sore throat. Wednesday, at work, it became more and more difficult to breathe and I stopped on the way home for Mucinex.  Everyone else's sickness got better, but not mine.

I kept getting sicker and sicker. I started running fevers that lasted for weeks. I was struggling to breathe. I started having drenching night sweats. I felt so bad, but never, ever, not one single time did it ever occur to me that I had cancer.

I went to the family doctor 3 times, took antibiotics twice and steroids once. Nothing. Finally Dr. N gave me a breathing test which I flunked. She then gave me a breathing treatment and re-tested me. Still flunked it. She ordered an x-ray, which was abnormal, and followed by a CT scan--my 1st of many to come.

My husband and I met in Dr. N's office and she informed us that I most likely had Lymphoma. I had no idea what that meant, so she had to spell it out: c-a-n-c-e-r.

Twin A and Twin B

 

Before and After

When I first became sick with Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma, it was suggested that I keep a diary of my experiences as I traveled on this journey.  There are plenty of reasons I did not.  First one being that I was so sick and felt I would never want to remember it. Secondly, I was in shock and couldn't fathom how gravely ill I really was. Writing it down may make it a reality I couldn't deny. Furthermore, there are periods of time I am unable to remember. My husband has filled me in little by little as I have continued to regain my health.

My Remission was confirmed in February and it is May now. I finally want to talk about what I have been through. I want my voice heard and it is my hope that someone who is where I once was will find my little corner of the Internet and be comforted and cheered. Things really and truly will be better. I promise. 

This photo was taken 6 weeks before my diagnosis and 8 weeks before my first chemo. I had no symptoms and no clue! I had never been sick and had just been given a clean bill of health a couple of months before this. My mammogram, pap smear, and all my blood work were perfectly normal. I took no medications of any kind and had never had any surgeries. I have always loved to cook and I believe in eating healthful foods. I went to the gym and was physically fit. I was healthy! Never had colds or flu. Never missed work due to illness. No complaints of aches or pains. No headaches. I can't have cancer; that is preposterous.

I miss my hair! I miss my color and the healthy glow of my complexion. I miss my scar-free chest.

~ ~ ~

Nine months later, it looks like 20 years have gone by. I lost a lot of weight very quickly and it sure shows in my face. Since I no longer have that nice layer of fat under my skin, it just hangs there. Because I have had a lot of trouble with chemo induced anemia, I have been as pale as snow. At least I am getting some color back. Here, I am wearing lipstick and eyebrows but no other makeup. And they say I look good. It makes me feel so sad thinking of how I must have looked when I was really sick.

Quick, put on a wig and scarf!